Glorious Chaos!

There might have been a day where I would have viewed the title of this post as an absolute oxymoron. However, today I am seriously loving how chaotic things are. Running in 100 different directions and trying to squeeze an 8-hr work day in on Christmas Eve. Having received less than 4 hours of sleep and running on empty. A 1-bedroom apartment with 6 people, 4 of them teenagers! Yet I can't stop singing Christmas carols. The morning began when I arrived at work and realized my phone wasn't where it was supposed to be. I tried calling the number and didn't hear anything so called my husband and left a message to look for my phone. Then I decided I would run out to the car to see if it might have fallen out of my purse. As I went to grab my keys, I discovered I had two sets of keys, mine and my husbands. There go the lunch plans! Now instead of running my last minute errands, I would be running home to pick up a phone and drop off the keys. I still managed to get it all done and was able to stop and get the stocking stuffers too! On a day that would normally find me cussing at all the other drivers on the road, shoppers in the stores and anyone else bold enough to get in my way, I found myself singing Christmas carols and unable to wipe the smile off my face! I am so filled with joy and happiness, even on 3 hours of sleep! Joy in looking at our beautiful Christmas tree and the pretty packages wrapped up below, joy in the 8 stocking stretched end to end on our two bookshelves, joy in the myriad of other decorations strewn throughout the apartment and joy in the faces and voices of all of my step-children, all filled with that special Christmas excitement! I feel more blessed than I deserve to be. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all!

Guilty Pleasures

This is such an odd year for me...I'm going Christmas crazy already and it's not even Thanksgiving. I'm usually the one cussing out all the people who have their shopping done already. No, I don't have my shopping done, but I sure have been in the mood! My husband and I are doing the 'deep clean' this weekend and decorating for Christmas. I am so excited about it too! We discussed it last weekend just to see if we were both crazy or what, but we agreed that we both want to be fully decorated before Thanksgiving this year. Yesterday my husband mentioned to me that he has a new guilty, sinful pleasure. He has fallen ridiculously in love with the new Hazelnut Hot Chocolate at Starbucks. He spends a lot of time there studying since he started the School of Ministry in the fall and also meets others there for various reasons. It got me to thinking about some of my own guilty pleasures though and since I have been so seasonally minded lately, I came up with the big one right away! I have a nasty penchant for purchasing all of the holiday magazines. I think I have four at home right now waiting to be read. The bright, colorful and snazzy covers just suck me in...and they do also have a lot of great ideas and wonderful recipes within their pages! I am bound and determined to do some homemade gifts this year so hopefully I will come up with some great ideas there as well. I think the reason I am super excited for the holidays this year is that we will have three of my step-children for both Thanksgiving and Christmas! I feel so very blessed...it's fun being a newlywed!

The Derminator!

Ok, so I had an appointment with a dermatologist this morning to get another treatment of liquid nitrogen on a plantar's wart on my little toe that has, embarrassingly, been there for close to 10 years. I got more than I bargained for on my trip. For starters, 'Doc', as I will unaffectionately refer to him from here on out, was a little overly anxious to point out all of my other flaws, right after he asked me what I was 'in for'. I barely got out the nature of my visit before he was talking about the rosacea on my cheeks and checking me for abnormal moles, including looking down my shirt both front and back! Then, when I showed him my foot with the plantar's wart, he noticed my dry, scaly, nasty, calloused feet and had to comment about them as well. Hello! Is it any wonder I have never had a pedicure...I have a heart here and would NEVER subject anyone to that. Doc kind of creeped me out and then I had to wait forever for him to get back with the liquid nitrogen to zap my toe. He covered far too much area and my toe was sore for a week! He wants to see me in a couple weeks to see how things look. I think we'll just skip that whole visit. If I have any more trouble with it, I'll be seeing my regular physician whom I love and trust dearly!

It's Just a Fantasy

My husband (the king of fantasy sports) has gotten me to join my first fantasy football league this fall.  If the level of excitement generated in the draft will come anywhere close to the excitement I will feel when the season gets underway on Thursday...we could be in trouble!  Wow, was that fun!  I can see how people can get so easily addicted to this stuff.  It's also a way to understand the sport a bit more, although I am quite football savvy, and get to know the players, etc...so I am very much looking forward to the upcoming season.  Of course you don't win a darned thing except the glory of having your name in lights if you happen to win your league.  I'm not sure how well I will do in my inaugural season but according to my husband, who basically chose my team for me, my team is stacked so it should be interesting!  Are you ready for some football?!

Fair Fun!

So...we survived our day at the fair despite its' highly grease-filled start!  We went straight from the 'Miracle of Birth' building to the 'Australian Battered Potatoes' booth.  Tasty but I could almost feel the pounds adding up as I ate them.  Thankfully, my husband and I split an order, which was still more than we needed, so we only induced half of the calories!  The rest of the day, food-wise, went very well for me.  We got some more of our favorite cinnamon-flavored nuts, we shared almonds and pecans...yummy!  Then, I had an apple, a raspberry malt and a bratwurst with sauerkraut and mustard for dinner.  That was it for food...I had a couple sodas but mostly drank water throughout the day.  Overall, I was happy with the amount of willpower I was able to summon up for the day.  I really wanted cheese curds but kept thinking about all the grease in those fried potatoes and it was enough to keep me away.  Since I had the pronto pup earlier this year at the county fair, I was able to pass on that.  The one thing I didn't get that I am regretting was the mini donuts, but I also had some of those earlier this year at the racetrack, so no great loss.  I suppose I'll have to get serious about the weight loss efforts now since the fair is over!  The rest of the day went very well at the fair and we thoroughly enjoyed the concert...even sat right in front of someone I went to high school with and haven't seen for over 20 years...so that was fun!  Next stop...the Renaissance Fair in a couple weeks!  Wine and turkey legs...here I come!

State Fair Time!

The Minnesota State Fair is here.  It started one week ago today and will end on Labor Day, 12 days of fun and frolic in total.  I will admit I haven't gone to the fair every year but have certainly been there my share of days.  I actually think it should be called the Minnesota Food Fair, but that's just my opinion.  In all honesty though, it would make for an interesting survey if you were to ask say, 100 people at the fair what brought them there...I think at least 3/4 of them would say the food.  That's what the focus seems to be each year in the media, the new 'foods on a stick' and all of the local news celebrities deciding what to eat next.  Sure, they do other things as well...mostly stupid but again, just my opinion.  So, as my husband and I prepare for our day at the fair, and a grandstand concert this evening that we have been anticipating for over two months now, I must admit that I would fall in with the majority in that survey...I almost obsess about the food I want to eat at the fair.  Not that it's such a great amount of food...it's just that I have my favorites.  I always have to do the corn dog with mustard (yes, usually the foot long because the others are just tiny)...cheese curds and one other thing, which I am typically flexible on, whatever looks good.  I've been found to munch on cheese curds, french fries, funnel cakes, etc...so there's no shortage of wonderful, tasty, grease filled and artery-clogging food at the fair.  My husband and I actually went last year and did very well.  I did have my corn dog and we shared some flavored almonds.  The only other thing we did was a wine-tasting which led to us purchasing a glass and sharing a small meat/cheese tray. Overall, it was a very successful fair outing for me last year.  I could add that at the time we went we had only been dating for two short weeks so perhaps there was the element of trying to impress him with my amazing will power, but I think I was just so ridiculously happy to be there with him that he was my focus and not the sights and smells of the fair.  So, I have been praying the last few days (in between salivating over what I want to eat) that God would keep my focus on just enjoying the day at the fair with my husband, relishing the fact that I am not at work and keeping me strong in Him.  I'll let you know how I 'fare' at the fair on a later date!

Creature Comforts

I'm sick.  I have some kind of cold/sinus infection that my husband passed along.  He's feeling somewhat better, I'm just getting started.  I always marvel at what happens to people (well, me anyway...I'm working under the assumption it happens to others as well) when they are under the weather.  I will admit I am not the world's 'sick champion'...I can tend to be a bit whiny and maybe even needy at times.  It depends on the illness...if it's a migraine, turn out the light, shut the door and leave me alone, but this isn't a migraine.  This is that sinus crap that makes you feel icky but not icky enough to justify staying home from work.  I digress.  Back to what I marvel at. This evening I was feeling good and crappy and just couldn't decide what I needed, tummy was feeling yucky but also hungry so, when I finally whined my husband out of the house, I decided to head to the store to find something to eat since nothing in the house looked good (yes, we did just go grocery shopping).  After perusing the aisles, I ended up with the always faithful chicken noodle soup and spaghettios.  Now, I don't honestly think the spaghettios that I just heated up in the microwave are going to go a long way to helping me feel better but they just looked right at the time.  Which caused me to marvel on the way home about how when I am sick I tend to veer toward what I ate growing up, things that remind me of home and my mother's tender touch.  My fingers are crossed...spaghettios here I come!

My Ship is In!

We took an impromptu trip to my favorite city this weekend.  My husband, step-daughter and myself decided late Friday night to take a trip to Duluth on Saturday.  It was supposed to be a day trip, but we had so much fun we ended up staying over night.  We were still down on the pier at 11pm watching ships come in and standing on the rocks trying to catch those chilly Lake Superior sprays!  What an awesome time we had.  I am a very spontaneous person and love those last minute trips very much and it was just so refreshing to know that my husband was the same way and that we are able to include his daughter from time to time as well.  He can say what he wants about his ex-wife, but at least she is very easy-going and didn't bat an eye when he called her late Friday night to say we were heading to Duluth for the rest of the weekend.

As we were watching the mammoth ships come into the harbor (I never tire of doing this)...I was just filled with happiness as I looked at my husband and step-daughter and realized that my ship had finally come in as well after years upon years of a dry dock.  My life is so complete right now and I am so very blessed.

To Trudy on her 37th Birthday!

That's right...Happy Birthday to me.  How funny that the title of this blog was the first thing I thought this morning when I woke up.  I knew I would write this post and had the beginnings of what I would say.  The reason I thought it was so funny is that I never saw the movie about Gillian (or was it Jillian, I can't say).   So, to me on my 37th birthday...I say it's been a pretty good year!

Here are just some of the events of my 36th year:

started Weight Watchers the 2nd week in August...

met Steven the 2nd week in August...

quit Weight Watchers the end of August after losing a total of 14lbs...

started my 2nd semester of school at the U of M in September...

finished my 2nd semester of school at the U of M in December...

traveled to AZ to visit my parents before Christmas...

decided to drop out of school in early January when I should have been registering for classes.

introduced my parents to Steven in mid-January when they came home so Dad could have his hip replaced...

announced our engagement to our parents in late January...

planned a wedding for 3 months...

married Steven on May 3rd...

and today...I am getting ready to celebrate my 37th birthday as a Tilseth and with the Tilseths!

I am richly blessed.  However, since dropping out of school and quitting Weight Watchers, I have found those lost 14lbs, along with about another 15 so I have lots of work to do in my 37th year!  My goal for one year from today is to shed 100lbs JUST by eating the right foods and getting lots of good exercise.  It is a new day!

p.s. This isn't my birthday cake here, but if I had a cake designer in the family...it sure as heck would be!!!

Fly those friendly, freaky skies!

I flew to Chicago this afternoon and was just struck by how crazy the people you fly with can be. I flew in on a smaller plane today, probably about 75 passengers or so, but they are all complete strangers and, let's face it, close in proximity! I think the crazy thoughts started coming to me when my seatmate decided to nod off for a while. To make the story richer though, I should mention that the guy sitting across the aisle from me, nodded off before we even took off and started snoring quite loudly. You know, the people that scare themselves awake because they don't know what that ridiculous noise was?! Nonetheless, several heads turned to try to discover who the snoring bandit was. My seatmate laughingly says to me ''Can you believe this guy"? I quietly chuckled and continued trying to read my book. We had barely taken off when my seatmate decided to catch a little shut-eye himself. I continued reading my book but out of the corner of my eye I occasionally saw him twitching...hands, arms, legs, feet, head, etc...nothing was out of the picture here. It appeared to me that the deeper the sleep, the more the twitching would occur. I started to become a bit concerned when the twitching led to full out arm flailing...first, he smacked the seat back in front of him, scaring the person in front of him awake. Ok, I did almost laugh out loud this time...honestly, it was tough not to. However, no real harm was done so soon he was back asleep and twitching away. He was holding a McDonald's cup full of ice (yeah, he was crunching on ice cubes right up until takeoff when they were almost all crunched on) in his hand on his lap and the next really big twitch resulted in his hands squeezing the cup until the lid popped off. In the process, he also tilted the cup and apparently had more ice cubes remaining then I was earlier led to believe, since the tipped cup produced a sizable amount of water, created by the melted, unchewed upon ice cubes. Now, this particular episode did produce more of a fuss for him since he now had a wet (and presumably cold) lap. The funniest part about all of this is that throughout all of it, I just continued to quietly read and pretend like nothing at all was happening. I'm not sure if he wasn't aware of what was happening but he didn't seem the slightest bit embarrassed by all of the goings on. It made for an entertaining flight and I was grateful I didn't walk off the plane with a nice shiner! Alas, I'm guessing the flight home won't be quite as interesting since I'll probably be among those sleeping since I take off at 6:30am! Happy flying all, and try to keep those eyes open!

Chi-Town

It would be just my luck that the very first time I go to Chicago is for a business trip.  I will be there solo for two nights and don't know how much sightseeing I will be able to achieve on my own, considering I have NO clue where anything is!  I'm kind of excited to just get out of town for a couple days, even if it is for work.  I wish my husband could join me but it's not in the cards, unfortunately.  It would have been awesome to take Friday off and make it a long weekend.  Oh well, I would have been stuck paying for the return flight then so I suppose it's best this way.  I guess I will have to do a bit of research to see how far I am from downtown because I have to get there at least one of the nights.  I do have an acquaintance there (close friend of a close friend of mine) so I will probably look them up to see if they are available one of the nights...preferably the first one, since I will be up ridiculously early to catch my flight back to MPLS on Friday!  Perhaps I will have some exciting pics to share upon my return...but don't hold your breath!

The "Corner"

I don't know what it is about this particular work station in the corner of my office building, but for some reason it attracts quite the cruddy people. The latest person to occupy it has been with the company for the last couple of months anyway, maybe more like three, but who knows...time flies. In any case, he is the first person to sit in this particular area since the last guy quit and the chair went inoccupado for probably about 14 or 15 months prior to the new guy starting. I don't even want to go back to the last guy and all the fun he was...but believe it or not, the new guy is so much worse in lots of ways. I'm sure I'll really only be able to name a few here though, any more and I will be in grave danger of losing my lunch. So, here's just a little taste of my daily dose of disgust at work:

1) He belches out loud and doesn't excuse himself. That's right, no polite burping here (although I consider that an oxymoron anyway). Of course, nobody has said anything but we're all quite disgusted by it...just a lot of head shaking and quiet chuckles of disbelief. Every once in a while if he really lets one loose, he will try to cover it up with some coughing as though the rest of us don't know what has just happened.

2) Still not sure if he does actually chew tobacco, don't think so because he couldn't get away with it for this long, however...he does have an Arizona tea bottle that he continually spits in throughout the day. I have taken it upon myself to throw this bottle on a few occasions, without inspecting it's contents and with a very heavy duty glove.

3) He has NO personal business apparently. Due to his complete lack of a work ethic he spends the majority of his day perusing the internet (shopping, banking, e-mailing, etc...) while the rest is spent on the phone with his wife (how he managed to do that, I have no idea at all), friends or his mother or father. We all know far more than we need to about his family and his own personal and miserable financial difficulties. There is no shame or embarrassment but more like some sort of horribly misplaced pride here. He is not quiet about any of these issues and it really is terribly annoying.

Alas, I must stop here because that is enough fun for one day. I truly wondered if it was just the chair or the work area or what. I mean, the last guy didn't do much work either and I'm just saying if this particular area comes with some type of clause stating work is not required, I think there should be a lottery for it or something, or maybe just a departmental rotation? Ok, enough ranting for today.

Verbiage Issues!

So, one of my biggest (and I mean BIGGEST) pet peeves is when people use words out of context! My annoyance with this is considerably amplified when said people use 'big' words out of context to try to impress others. Sorry, but that just confirms your idiot status in my eyes. Come on, if you're going to pull it out of the repertoire...use it the right way!!!!! There isn't one specific person (anymore) that is doing this but it just seems that lately I've been getting this from people and it's making me bonkers. An ex-manager used to use the word nomenclature a lot, in the correct context, mind you. It's not a real favorite word of mine but I think just because it is a word that is used quite often in the particular industry I work in, others just throw it out there, whether it works or not! I wish I could think of the particular word that an ex-coworker used all the time and he used it to try to sound much more intelligent than the person he was talking to at the time. Unfortunately, he has been gone too long (no, actually the fact he is gone is quite fortunate) for me to remember what it was. I could probably look at past posts and I bet I brought it up somewhere! Funny that I've forgotten because he used the word several times a day it seemed. I guess our minds do serve us well at times by allowing us to forget life's little annoyances. I'm sure it will come to me sometime though! So, along with grammar I have a big thing with spelling too...which brings me to the title of my post and the word verbiage. Every once in a while...you run into a word that you know is spelled correctly but it still doesn't look right. This is one of those words for me...why the 'i'? They do the same thing with the word carriage, which comes from carry. Why wouldn't verbiage be spelled verbage, like bondage or carnage? I don't get it and I suppose I never will. How sick is it that I could talk about this all day?

Dreamy Haze

I had the strangest dream last night. It was my wedding day (which already occurred 39 days ago) and my parents were like two giant anchors. The wedding was scheduled for 1pm (even though we actually got married at 3pm) and I was hanging around waiting for my parents to get back from somewhere? so we could get to the church for the wedding. They didn't show up until almost 12:30pm and then I don't even think we got to the church until like 2pm. I have no idea what this dream was about, but the startling thing was that they didn't think there was a problem with any of this! Eventually I called Kate (my maid of honor) who told me that several of the guests had already left because they had other things to do. Sadly, I woke up before knowing whether or not the wedding ever took place, although the last thing I remember is my parents coming down in an elevator still dressed in their casual clothes and my mom asking some really stupid, totally unrelated question. I was outraged by their lack of concern yet could not give a voice to this outrage. I just stared at them dumbfoundingly as though I couldn't believe this was even happening. I am very big into dream analysis, analyzing in my own head, mind you, there is nothing scholarly or professional about this (although I did take a class at SCSU called 'Psychology of Sleeping and Dreaming', but that was 15 years ago). So, I really just can't figure this one out. Obviously the wedding has already taken place and everything ran according to schedule and my parents were the efficient, responsible people they always are. Perhaps I feel I owe an apology to some of my guests for STILL not getting a thank you to them? Or could this be a sign of what I'll be like someday when my own child gets married due to my lack of planning, organization or seeming concern about the mess my life is in so many ways? I just don't get it at all! Does it mean that something should have been done differently with my wedding (perhaps in a church that actually HAS an elevator?)? In any case, I'm not that concerned about the dream, just puzzled to say the least. It was very odd, but hopefully not very telling of the future! I think I'll try to clean a few things up just in case it was!

Step-Children

Well, meeting the kids went just fine. They are surprisingly well-behaved, but of course could also just be on their best behavior for their dad and new step-mom. My husband will go pick them up from Grandma and Grandpa's house this afternoon and we will most likely have them until we take them back home on Saturday. They have spent the past few days with their sister (or half-sister) Olivia at her house. It just seems so odd to me to have Steve's (2nd) ex-wife so involved in what seems to be every aspect of our life. She's not a bad person, a tad annoying sometimes, but otherwise a good person. It's just that she still seems to be so involved with the family. I know a great deal of this is because they have a child together who we still see regularly, but it's just very strange. It strikes at that jealousy chord again I suppose. I did end up with a migraine on Saturday night after all the hustle and bustle with the kids and my husband was sweet enough to get them out of the apartment so I could rest. Then when they got home he came into the bedroom where I was resting with a big grin on his face and said that he brought me ice cream home. Ok, so he still has a thing or two to learn about migraines. I love him all the same. And the kids had a great Harry Potter/ice cream party while I slept off the migraine. Hopefully the kids will be back and the migraine will stay away now!

Introductions

Above are a couple pictures of my husband's youngest daughter Olivia (who was a junior bridesmaid in our wedding) So, tonight I will be meeting two more of my husband's children and I couldn't be more nervous if I tried. My husband is twice-divorced and has 4 children with his first wife and one with his second. His first wife is (or at least was and seemingly still is) quite the case...I think we've lost track of how many fathers took part in making up her 9 children, but we think it's 5. In any case, this weekend I will meet one of his 14 year old twin sons and his youngest daughter with wife #1, who I believe is 12. I'm not so nervous about meeting her, but quite nervous about meeting him...especially since he just found out about me a few days ago! My husband has been quite estranged from the kids, much due to his ex-wife trying desperately to keep them away from him, and I know he is very excited to see them since he hasn't for about a year and a half. This is all made even stranger by the fact that we all now share the same last name so it would seem as though I should have some level of familiarity with these people, but there really is none, with the exception of a few photos I've seen. It's very strange.

So, I will just have to play the supportive wife and try to be myself in the hopes that it goes as well as it did meeting the first two. It's quite strange for me too...almost surreal because it is a part of my husband that I am still getting to know. I am also a very jealous person and it's hard for me to see all of the love that he has for his children. It's not that I wouldn't want him to love them with all he has, but it's difficult because it feels like it's taking something away from me. Probably ridiculous, but it's also very real. So, I guess I'll just say a prayer that all goes well for us in the next week with the kids and that I can stay strong and supportive for my new husband!

What a Difference a Year Makes!

I am just laughing at the irony here. It would appear my boss is rushing through all of our reviews this afternoon. Although I have been given no notice of this review, I do believe I will be having it today and I am not up for it at all! I am actually despising my job today and have been very dismal indeed...which could not bode well at all in a review. We were given the loathful 'self-evaluation' forms this year to fill out and I was quite honest. I admitted there are areas that I struggle with and need to really improve upon but also placed blame where it was more than due for lack of training, etc...which resulted in an account being poorly handled. In any case, I really hope I can get through the next hour and 10 minutes without a review.

The irony is that last year I had to continually harp on my boss (and his boss) for my review because I was pining for a major pay increase since my job responsibilities and title had changed. I did get the raise eventually, even though it was about 3 months overdue and I received no back pay. It wasn't as much as I had hoped for and something tells me that I won't be getting a raise this time around. I just found it interesting to think back to last year at this time and my repeated attempts to have my review taken care of and now today I don't even want to go through it. Oh well, it's beyond time to be job shopping anyway!

Well, since this post is still "scheduled" (what's that delay about now anyway?) I thought I would tack on an addendum...I did just receive my review and was handed a meager pay increase (basically just cost of living). I suppose it's better than nothing, but still. I will just have to work on improving everything I can while I am still here so that in the unlikely event I'm still here come next June I will receive an even heftier increase.

I'm Really Married!

So, my husband and I were married just over a month ago and I think I'm still kind of reeling and working it all out in my head. It's the oddest feeling, but it's almost as though it was all a great dream, except I know that it happened (the hundreds of thank-you's I'm still working to complete are evidence of that)! Although this picture (another of my favorites) kind of has that fairy tale quality with the arch! The odd thing is that I look at my ring finger (a lot) and look at the pictures and video and I see that it's me up there but it still somehow doesn't seem entirely real. Everything just happened so quickly (including the courtship) and I think I just didn't have time to process it all, even though we enjoyed it immensely. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm glad we only had 3 months of planning into it because it all goes by in such a rush! I remember my dad whispering to me right before we walked down the aisle to 'enjoy my moment' (which choked me up) and that's all it really was, a moment. I have a good friend getting married in September and they will have been engaged for 14 months at the time of the wedding...I could just have never done that. I suppose it worked out the way it was supposed to for me, but I'm still trying to put it all together! So many people always say that being married doesn't really feel any different than just living together, that you just get a new name. I suppose there's is a slight letdown because it's new and I never really knew what to expect, but I like married life and I sure do love my husband! I feel like such an adult and even have a 'real' banking account and a new car (ok, two years old is new enough for me) to show for it! Life is grand.

Favorite Wedding Pics!

Our beautiful flowers (some of them)!

The bride and bridegroom! My big brother below!

Mom and dad (below left)

My maid of honor and best friend Kate!

I just had to post a few of my favorites from the big day! It went almost perfectly and we couldn't have asked for a nicer day...so God was good!

Crossroads?

Once again, I am getting very restless in my job and am really hankering for a change soon. There are advantages and disadvantages to where I'm at right now, the number one advantage being that I have been here for 4 years and 4 months now (yes, the longest I've held down any full-time job) and it's comfortable, even though I don't care much for my job at all. The number one disadvantage is that the benefits basically suck and I pay through the nose for them. Another advantage is that I make a fairly decent income with my current employer and it provides stability, which is never a bad thing. When I started this job in 2004, I promised myself I would not make a move (voluntarily, that is) just to get out of there if I was unhappy, but rather it would be a move more on the permanent side and hopefully something I found a great deal of interest and enjoyment in. That's where my main struggle is right now, I don't know where to go or what I really want to do. That's not true, I'd prefer to be at home, barefoot and pregnant, only that's not an option since we are a two-income household. I guess I'll just have to keep mulling things over...I figure there's just GOT to be something out there that has a better benefit package. We're hoping to be pregnant within a year and right now I don't even have paid maternity leave here, so that would be a good place to start. Ok, I'm done venting now. I guess I better get back to my crummy job.

Mr. and Mrs. T!

That's right...I'm Mrs. T now! Just had a few honeymoon pictures from our trip to St. Louis and thought I would share a few of my favorites! We fell in love with the city and could easily live there someday...we even picked out our neighborhood!

The following pictures are from Busch Stadium (home of the St. Louis Cardinals). We didn't get to see a game because the Cards were out of town all week but we did catch two Royals games in Kansas City. We opted to take a tour of the stadium instead, which was very cool!


This is so awesome...outdoor baseball is fantastic in the first place but can you imagine having this as a backdrop at home plate?
The following pictures were taken at the Missouri Botanical Gardens, one of our favorite day trips and we still didn't have enough time to see everything!


Those are just a few favorites from the highlights of our trip. I hope to have some wedding pictures to share soon!

I'm Hitched!

I'm back to work today, freshly married and honeymooned (pictures to follow). My secret pleasure of the day has been looking at all of my paper memos and e-mails with my new married name...it looks so good! Somehow, it makes it all even that much more official! I am so ridiculously happy and I love to hear my new husband say "You look good married". I was just bursting at the seams on our wedding day...which ended up being beautiful and sunny (albeit slightly windy) and not rainy and/or snowy as had been predicted! I just beamed the entire day, it was all so wonderful. The honeymoon was fantastic and we think we may have discovered the next place we want to live when the cold and snow finally drives us out of MN!

I'm so happy that even being back to work today can't damper my spirits much anyway. I'd certainly rather still be on my honeymoon with my husband, but it's doable today. I'm quite anxious to get our pictures back now of course! Just wanted to check in as a married woman and will be back with pictures when I have them!

Sadie, Sadie...old lady?

So, I've been floating around very lightfooted...anxious to be married to the man of my dreams. I have also been found to be singing a song from an all-time favorite movie "Funny Girl"..."Sadie, Sadie...Married Lady". My future mother-in-law (as in 3 days in the future) majorly burst my joyful little bubble on Sunday when she uttered "In 6 days, there will be another Mrs. Tilseth". Suddenly that spring in my step felt more like a 200lb anchor and Mrs. Tilseth didn't sound as enchanting as Fanny Brice made 'Mrs. Arnstein' sound in the movie. Just the idea of becoming a Mrs. was somewhat devastating...made worse with the fact that my adoring fiance' readily agreed with me when I said 'that makes me feel old' by saying 'honey, you are old'. Well, I'll still always have 4 years on him! I just found it funny, in an odd sort of way, that a silly title like that can have such an impact on the way we view things.

Oh well, Mrs. Tilseth or not...I'm still looking forward to married life, starting with a nice relaxing honeymoon next week where I will be refusing to think about work or anything else! But first, the joyous event which will turn me from Miss to Mrs. with a few words and an exchange of rings and a kiss! I guess I'm officially excited again!

I do...I do...I do!

I've finally reached that place of peace, contentment, anticipation and excitement that is no longer marred by worry, anxiety, doubt and genuine freaked outedness! The last wedding hurdle has been cleared, the last fire extinguished and now, with 4 days until the wedding...everything is in place and ready and we can just wait peacefully. What a glorious feeling! My coordinator just today asked me if I was remembering to stay calm and let everybody else worry about the details. And it was only as of about 35 minutes ago that I was able to say yes! However, it was a resounding yes! I'm not even concerned about the weather anymore, especially since that is the one thing we absolutely have no control over! Just somewhere around 1 1/2 work days left and then I will have seven glorious days off.

I really must commend myself too for the way I have handled myself through this entire process. I've learned something (through the eyes of my fiance') about my mother during the planning of my wedding. She really can be quite an uptight person and very edgy. Steven noticed this virtually right away and commented on how wound she is. I guess I just never really noticed it that much before, and yet, this is the first wedding I've planned with her too! At times when I was feeling relatively calm and unconcerned about things, she would get me all riled up to the point of my becoming confused and questioning things I thought I already had figured out! It was challenging to say the least and I did have a few 'Bridezilla' moments and also times where I just broke into tears and fell apart for no apparent reason at all except to just want it all to end right then and there! I just know that everything is going to come together so beautifully and perfectly on our day, even if the snow decides to fly after all. We are beyond ready and so very excited to become man and wife.

Ain't Life Peculiar?

This morning, as I was taking my daily jaunt to my page on "The Knot" I was just struck with the absurdity that life can sometimes bring. Perhaps that isn't the right word, providential might be more in line with my train of thought here? When Steven and I started dating last August I began dreaming of our wedding day (things really did happen that quickly) and after his proposal in September I decided to go to "The Knot" and start our fictitious page. I entered a 'fictitious' wedding date, aiming for September of '08 and began to dream some more, all the while questioning whether or not we would really make it there. This morning I went to the page (my favorite thing to do for the past couple weeks) to look at our lucky number and was struck by how crazy life can be...the number no longer read 100+ but NINE (that's right, the number between 8 and 10) and it's no longer a 'fictitious' number but an ACTUAL number. And it is no longer visited only by yours truly, but by many friends and family members as well, who are all counting down and preparing for the big celebration with us! Who woulda thunk? At the time of Steven's proposal I thought a year from then was going to be too soon and here we are just 8 months later, ready to do the deed. I couldn't be more thrilled, even in the face of such peculiarities!

18 and Life!

How funny that I should be thinking of Skid Row today. I hope that's not some bad omen or anything! My favorite thing to do lately (Steven's too) is count down the days to our wedding. I think we started at 30 or something. Today marks 18 days to go and I have had Skid Row's "18 and Life" song in my head all morning, as though my pending marriage is some type of prison sentence. Oh, to be a child of the 80's is not always a good thing.

On the contrary...I couldn't be looking more forward to the big day! We are at a point now where all of the major stuff is in place and it's just the minor details. Boy, nobody ever told me those were the ones that would really forge the migraines! There's so much, my head has been spinning non-stop. I just want to be sure everything is in place so that I don't miss anything because the last thing I want to be doing is worrying about all of it on my wedding day! The plan (which I hope to execute perfectly!) is to not worry about anything. I know things won't go perfectly but I should still be able to perfectly enjoy the day. Today I get to go pick up my ring FINALLY! We picked it out over a month ago and have been chipping away at it slowly and today I will be able to make the final payment and pick the ring up! It was so good that I had to wait though, and even be ring-less for 3 out of 4 showers, because it has helped me focus on the things that really matter. I've never been material, but let's face it, a girl loves a diamond! It will just be fun to be 'officially' engaged for 18 days before the wedding. Well, 'official' as in the way the world looks at it. Ok, I want the bling and will be thrilled to have it!

Six Weeks to the altar!

I just have no idea where the time has gone. Just six weeks now until the big day and I'm feeling surprisingly prepared. We seriously planned this shindig in like 5 weeks. It CAN be done! And it's going to be beautiful...I am so excited. I've never been happier in my life and feel so incredibly blessed. God is good indeed! Just a few minor details to tend to and we should be ready to roll. Hopefully I'll have lots of fun pictures to post when it's all said and done! This is our engagement picture, I just love how happy we both look! We truly are and I look forward to a lifetime of happiness with Steven!

Here Comes The Bride!!!!

Wow, is it time to dust off the old blog or what???!!! What better reason for a new post then to announce (yes, most likely to myself) that I am getting married on May 3, 2008! I am beyond excited about things and am busy planning but it has sure been lots of fun so far, for the most part! The invitations are going out in the mail this Saturday, which is incredibly hard to believe! I will post of picture of the happy couple...although Steven decided to keep his eyes half-closed! More later...just had to share the great news!